Fearless Friday: Surviving girl cliques.
Girl cliques. They're a part of every girl's story. Either you were in a fierce one and served on the Queen Bee's royal court or you were cast among the civilians and not even offered a second glance. I've been there time and time again. And, I'm 37! I've seen more cliques than I care to admit...and very rarely was I ever in the "it-girl crowd". It's not a pity party I'm seeking though...I've learned a lot over the years and now I have two little girls. I can feel myself gearing up for middle school already!
There's two types of leaders in this world. There are the positive, influential and fun ones to be around OR there are the girls that act as manipulative leaders and often demean others. Clearly the latter is totally unappealing as a grown woman but what do we tell the younger generation? What advice do we give them?
I was chatting with a girlfriend last night in the car about cliques around town and yes, we were giggling a little bit but the bigger picture is that cliques really exist at any age. And, it's how you cope with them that define your character and make you the type of human being that others admire and want to be around.
With that said, here are my quick tips for surviving a girl clique:
- Kill 'em with kindness. Just because "you can't sit with them" doesn't mean you can't make their heads spin with a warm embrace and a hello. They'll be so confused!
- Reach out to the wall flowers. Often times these women have the potential to be life-long friends...they just need to be given the opportunity. Walk over and introduce yourself.
- Do not judge. You never know someone else's struggle. Reserve your opinion.
- Ask for her number. That's right...get her digits. If you see someone you like, arrange a coffee and make the effort.
- Walk away. If certain social occasions are making you feel "not worthy," walk away and find a group of more like-minded women.
No matter what - always trust your gut. If it smells like a clique, acts like a clique and talks like a clique...it's a CLIQUE. Depending on what side of the fence you're on, it can be fun for awhile and certainly have its perks. Ultimately it's a lot of work. Friendship should be easy and women should empower each other.
We shouldn't be competing with each other; we should be supporting and encouraging the many reasons that make us unique, talents and all! Happy Friday!