The no-judgement zone
A friend recently relayed a story to me about her daughter at school. For quite some time that little girl was best friends with another little girl. They were happy as clams. Then school started and the playground got bigger. In fact, it was the transition from Kindergarten to First Grade. More kids, bigger class rooms. Turns out my friend's daughter {and don't quote me because I am digging within the bowels of my memory} started to notice that her best friend seemed less interested in her. They used to share the same interests but lately, it seemed like she was interested in the other little girls more. She in fact, became a ring leader of sorts and grew a new entourage of diligent followers. And one night, my friend's daughter broke the silence and tearfully told her mom that her best friend was becoming closer to the other girls and didn't want to play her games on the playground anymore. In a way, they had outgrown each other. Tough stuff at such a young age.
That conversation bounces around in my head quite a bit. One...because my friend and I both have daughters so naturally I think of my Olivia feeling this way one day which is totally inevitable and heart breaking at the same time. And two...because I've been through this more times than I can count and it really stopped me in my tracks. If you think about it, females are challenging and we've been facing the same issues starting at the age of 6 to the age of 66. Even my mother and her friends relay stories of women cutting down each other or showing a lack of support for each other. Look at reality TV! It's a complete judgement zone out there.
And then I think of myself. My friends. Their stories and my stories. By your mid 30's, you've started to see a bit more than the golden days of hearts and rainbows. People make mistakes. You make mistakes. I think it's a thing called life from what I hear. And yet, the story of the playground still resonates with me except I/we are now on an adult playground but the "games" are really the same. I guess my point is...while I am not perfect, I'd like to think I've made some progress on my flaws and in turn, opened up my mind to accepting and finding the good in all types of people. {trying as it may be sometimes} And I think it's a good reminder that we all should...should find the good in people and accept everyone into our group. The above quote was a springboard for this topic so from now on...I am declaring 101 things i love a "no judgement zone." Perhaps this is the single most principle I want to instill in Olivia, too.
My question for you is...how do you feel about this topic?
Do you think women support other women?
Do you think we could do better?
Have you been on the receiving end?
I'd love to hear your thoughts realizing this might be a bit controversial.
{remind me to punch myself later for posting this if the comments turn into utter anarchy}
Cheers and thanks for reading.